Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Have you ever just been weary with life? Not depressed, just weary. Like, I’m weary of getting up, every single day, showering, shaving and doing my hair every single day. Weary of driving to and from work, every single day. Weary of making dinner, every single day. Lather, rinse, repeat. Every single day. It just feels tedious.

Maybe part of it is because I’ve been not liking my job lately. I hate the phones, hate them hate them hate them, and I don’t want to talk to people. Maybe part of it is my super early shift that’s got me so darn tired all the time. Maybe part of it is that I’m totally stuck in a rut when it comes to making dinner. It’s basically been narrowed down to 4 or 5 things that I know the boys will eat, so we have those every week. I need to make more chicken dishes and make them deal with it. I just feel so bad when they don’t end up eating much and I know they’re hungry. I know I can’t force them to eat what they don’t want, so I end up making something I know they’ll like.

My bright spot, that isn't tedious, is coming home every day and spending time wtih my family. Plus, next week Brian and I go on our anniversary trip and I’m so excited. I’m just trudging through the days until I get to the fun stuff. Actually, I do that Monday through Friday, until I get to the weekend, so I can live my personal life and be with my loved ones. Trudging through the days is no way to live. I need to find a way to make peace with my job and with my daily routine. Maybe then the tedium will disappear.

Posted by Michelle at 10:10  
Hannah said...

Just wanted to give you a big hug and let you know that I love you!

I have every faith that the early hours are not helping you at ALL. Speaking from experience - and you have 1 billion more things going on than me! On those days I get up early (and now I get to sleep in - to 4:15!) it just makes a fog for my entire day. And you do it...daily. I bow down to you! Really. And then your commute. Seriously, that has to just add to it.

I'm glad you enjoy the time with your sweet boys. (Adult boy and little boys!) That speaks volumes and makes me smile for you. :)

Give yourself a big pat on the back. And a big hug from Kansas! Can't wait to hear about your trip!

Tuesday, October 6, 2009 at 2:54:00 PM PDT  

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